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Dystopia Dark Lager

by Blair Sayer

$19.00 + free shipping
Brown
Tee
Limit 15 per customer
  • Standard - Estimated delivery Nov 08 - Nov 09
  • Express - Estimated delivery Nov 06
  • Free Express shipping for Prime members

We Don’t Need Another Beer-o

A Whirlwind of Brewing, a Firestorm of Beer

Hey, beer fans; Max here. You know, besides gasoline and (I suppose) my own blood, there’s only one fluid I really can’t live without. That’s Dystopia Dark Lager. Nothing obliterates the psychic pain of horrific memories like ten or eleven Dystopias. And the flavor? Well, let’s not ruin a perfectly civil conversation by talking about that.

It’s a harsh world out there. We’ve all seen things we’d like to forget. In my case, multiple incidents of savage cruelty. In your case, maybe Waterworld. Dystopia rinses it all right out of your brain, quick as you can choke the stuff down! Take it from me: Once you’ve conditioned yourself to swallow a mouthful of Dystopia without involuntarily gagging, you’ll never drink another beer.

Maybe literally, since a mouthful of some of the bad batches exceeds the lethal dose.

Wear this shirt: to work at the pig-feces power plant. It’s brown, so the smears won’t show! They’ll stink, sure, but they won’t show.

Don’t wear this shirt: without leathers, unless you want road rash.

This shirt tells the world: “Given the choice between a frosty mug of Dystopia or sawing through my own ankle, I always take…

“Well, hang on, how big a mug are we talking about?”

We call this color: Bartertown Brown

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Features

Our graphic tees are made for every day that you need to get shirt done! Seriously, our t-shirts have been a graphic tee loving enthusiast's favorite since 2007. Our shirts are printed in the USA and every time you buy a shirt, one of our talented artists gets paid!

T-Shirts

For sizing info, care and fabric details click here.

Women’s V-Necks

For sizing info, care and fabric details click here.

Tank Tops

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Long Sleeves

For sizing info, care and fabric details click here.

Pullover Hoodies

For sizing info, care and fabric details click here.

Crewneck Sweatshirts

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Zip Hoodies

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Raglans

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Specs

Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
0m 23.000s

Purchaser Experience

  • 0% first woot
  • 96% second woot
  • 4% < 10 woots
  • 0% < 25 woots
  • 0% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 4% joined today
  • 1% one week old
  • 2% one month old
  • 28% one year old
  • 64% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 96% bought 1
  • 4% bought 2
  • 0% bought 3 or more

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

17%
6%
3%
2%
2%
3%
6%
9%
11%
9%
8%
7%
4%
1%
1%
1%
1%
1%
1%
1%
1%
1%
1%
1%
12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Percentage of Sales Per Day

4%
6%
5%
73%
5%
3%
4%
Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat Sun

Woots by State

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Dystopia Dark Lager by Blair Sayer
$19.00 In Stock Apparel & Accessories
$19.00 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 15
Woot! Shirt.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.