1st place in Derby #169 Phobias, with 964 votes!

Once upon a time, there was a nice little girl who heard about a different little girl in a red cloak. And that nice little girl decided she wanted to be a little girl in a red cloak too! Plus, since she lived in a different town, she figured that the different little girl would never ever know! And so, the nice little girl bought a red cloak of her own, and everyone in town said it was lovely.

But then, one day, a woodsman was passing through. And this woodsman had been to other towns as well, and so he had seen the red cloak before. Of course, the nice little girl denied everything, but the wise old men of the town began to stroke their beards and wonder. And so, once day the nice girl grabbed her red cloak and ran into the woods, where she intended to convince the birds and squirrels that she was original and cool.

But the nice little girl did not think about the cruelty of Nature. And she soon became aware that, in the dark, her red cloak made her even more of a target. And yet, she never took it off, because without her red cloak, who would she be? Just the same as everyone else? What sort of life was that for such a talented nice little girl with such excellent taste in cloaks! Instead, she pulled it tighter, and refused to let it go.

But, in the darkness, the nice little girl could hear the distant breathing that made her feel like prey.

Wear this shirt: instead of sheep’s clothing.

Don’t wear this shirt: to Grandmother’s house. There’s a reason she moved over the river and through the woods and you don’t want to cause her any flashbacks.

This shirt tells the world: “You don’t see a phobia? Why, this is very clearly the fear of getting caught!”

We call this color: Black Hearted Monsters Lurk Behind Trees

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