3rd place in Derby #90: Almost, with 925 votes!

We’re all children when we want something. We don’t care what it would do to the tides or how much of the Earth would be destroyed on impact or even where we would keep it once we got it home. We just know that if we could get it, and keep it, everything would be all right.

We’re collectors, maybe not affluent collectors, but we’ve done okay for ourselves. We got that bear and that fishbowl. Remember how much we wanted them? And now they’re only stepping stones. Pebbles in the predestined path that guided us to to our one true love.

So maybe it’s better to have something beautiful just out of reach. Maybe our dreams are just a little sweeter if every now and then we find something that we just can’t have. Just remember that this shirt isn’t one of those things you can’t have. Hit that button as fast as you can.

Wear this shirt: when you go visit Neil Armstrong. He’ll pat you on the head and say “She ain’t worth it, kid” and how cool would that be to tell people, that Neil Armstrong told you “She ain’t worth it, kid”? That would be a pretty cool thing, all right.

Don’t wear this shirt: during an eclipse. That’s clingy and co-dependent. Just wait a few minutes, it’s coming back. Chill out.

This shirt tells the world: “Don’t fall in love with me. I have a dark side.”

We call this color: Na-vy Maria

Back to top