Let me tell you how much I love you: 

We are like two battle toads. Together we fight our way through the bird-filled crater known as life.

We are like Ray Man's various appendages. We are one with each other, even when there is distance between us.

We have each other's backs, like Billy and Jimmy Lee of Double Dragon. Except we're not related. That would be weird.

Your kisses are like the bombs of Bomberman. They are precise, yet far-reaching, and explosive.

You are to me, a Metal Slug. I will always think you're great, despite your violent nature and jingoistic way of looking at the world.

I am Ecco the Dolphin and you are my first level. I will never, ever leave you.

Wear this shirt: when you're about to unleash a sexy a-b-up-down combo.

Don't wear this shirt: if you're afraid to commit.

This shirt tells the world: "My baby's made of pixels."

We call this color: I shall carve thy name in slate!

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