Absence makes the heart grow fonder.

Among certain peoples, a millionaire is a person who has given away a million dollars. Among certain peoples, the richest man owns nothing, because he has given it all to others. In this world where we pile up extras we’ll never use… wait, we actually support that sort of thing. That’s our whole business model. Look, forget this entire paragraph, okay?

What we meant to say was this: if someone you loved was sick, wouldn’t you give up a kidney? Or a lung, if it meant the difference between life or death for your fellow man? Or a couple feet of intestines and a little smidgen of liver? The human body knows that redundancy helps us all. Keep that in mind when you see the “Buy two” option. You never know when you’re going to wish you had something to give to a loved one. Or even a stranger.

Wear this shirt: so that when people ask about the blank, you can tell them the story of Odin, who sacrificed his eye for knowledge. They didn’t keep records in those days so we don’t know who got the eye but it must have been pretty cool, walking around seeing everything with Odin’s eye. Like HDTV for life.

Don’t wear this shirt: if you’re worried people will think you’re a tin woodsman who has not yet met the Great and Powerful Oz.

This shirt tells the world: “No, wait! That’s not a legal document I’m wearing! It’s a joke! A joke requiring a little bit of thought! Wait!”

We call this color: White Blood Sale

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