3rd place in Derby #559: Fake Promotional & Event Tees!

In the future, books will speak to us. And no, not just to read us the text aloud. They will be interactive. They will laugh with us as we read. They will gasp as we gasp. And when a character dies and the tears well up in our eyes, the book will tell us, "There, there, Chad!" For in the future, we will all be named Chad!

In the future, books will be like pets. We will walk them on leashes, and they will cuddle us at night, and we will have to buy book food, and take them for appointments at the book vet, and when they're really old, they'll get kind of tired and slow and sometimes they'll do book potty outside of the book box, and it'll be like, man, could someone explain to us why we made books like pets again?

In the future, you will turn over a book and find a mirror where the author photo should be. And in that moment, you will know: we are all the author. Then all of the phones in the world will ring, and it will be our editor, asking for a 11,000 word rewrite by noon tomorrow.

In the future, books will have no beginning or end. Or middle. Or title. Or spine, or cover. All will be replaced by a thick green trunk and countless thorns and in the middle there will be wate-- oh wait, nope. Sorry. That's a cactus.

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