3rd place in Derby #193: Catchy Slogans for Everyday Products, with 1071 votes!

Hello, Mr. Johnson. I hear we’re having a little chest pain this afternoon. Let’s just check these charts and see if we can’t figure out the problem.

I see. Says here you’re fatigued and a little uncomfortable? Okay. And the pain is right around you diaphragm just above your stomach, yes? Hmm. How odd. When did all this start? Just after breakfast? And what did you have to eat? Ah. I think I know what the problem is. Let’s just have a look at your x-ray to confirm…

Yep. Just as I thought. There’s the problem. See these dark clumps there, there, and there? Mm hmm. See what’s happened is that the hotcakes you ingested this morning have stuck to your ribs.

Nah, it’s nothing to worry about. They’ll probably dislodge around dinner time. That fatigue’s going to be with you all day, though. Have you got some comfy sweat pants and access to some mindless television? Excellent. An afternoon of that and you should be just fine.

Wear this shirt: with a side of hash browns and bacon.

Don’t wear this shirt: if you prefer waffles, which, let’s face it, are really superior to hotcakes in every way.

This shirt tells the world: “Pass the butter and syrup (or powdered sugar, fruit compote, whipped cream, WHATEVER).”

We call this color: Can I Get A Large Orange Juice With That?

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