3rd place in Derby #189: Woodland Animals, with 801 votes!

Some animals get by on camouflage, on making themselves as inconspicuous as possible, on fading into the scenery and hoping nobody looks hard enough to actually see them.

Wusses.

I ain’t goin’ out like that. I’m orange, I’ll always be orange, and I could give two scats about blending in. When I’m coming, you’ll see it. When I’m there, you’ll know it. You’ll never catch me changing my coat from season-to-season like some fairweather canid. I’m standing tough, walking tall, staying orange. And when some bigger, scarier animal comes along looking to do me harm, well, I can run pretty fast.

Wear this shirt: when you’re hunting the elusive white porcupine.

Don’t wear this shirt: if you’re trying to pass as white.

This shirt tells the world: “Orange is the color of my true fox’s hair.”

We call this color: Aw, Man, We Already Used Our Best White Up There In “Don’t wear this shirt”.

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