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If a tree falls in the woods

by NomadSlim

$19.00 + free shipping
Limit 15 per customer
  • Standard - Estimated delivery Dec 16 - Dec 17
  • Express - Estimated delivery Dec 13
  • Free Express shipping for Prime members

No Timber Left Behind

Every year, thousands of trees fall in this forest. My job is to make sure someone is there to hear them when they do.

It’s as glamorous a career as the one those hoity-toidy fire lookouts in their big fancy towers have. It takes hard work, dedication, and a keen ear to do this job. But you’ve gotta have heart, too. You have to care, really care about what goes on here on the forest floor.

Every one of these trees is like a roommate I was really close to back in college to me. If Greg Thornbatch fell over during a keg stand, I made darn sure I was there to hear him, to console him, to drag him out of that party and apologize on his behalf for embarrassing the host. That’s almost exactly what I do for these great green hulking plants you see around me. Without the party bit, of course. And the beer. Well, there’s some beer. A guy gets thirsty out here listening for trees to fall. But being there after it happens? It lets the trees know that they’re important, that someone thought enough of them to be at their side when the end came. It may not be flashy, but it’s rewarding as hell.

And then I chop them up and sell them by the chunk as firewood out of the back of my truck when I drive into town. Heck, that’s more than I can say I did for Greg Thornbatch. Legally, I mean. At least until the trial is over.

Wear this shirt: if you’re a lumberjack and you’re okay.

Don’t wear this shirt: if you’re still making “I’ve fallen and I can’t get up” jokes in public.

This shirt tells the world: “It’s fallen and it can’t get up.”

We call this color: Down Where The Green Grass Grows

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Our graphic tees are made for all those days (see every day) that you need to get shirt done! Our professionally printed t-shirts are produced in-house to create an experience you will never forget.

Seriously, our t-shirts have been a graphic tee loving enthusiast's favorite since 2007. Our t-shirt designs are created by the best artists in the industry. We know that the combination of our t-shirts, exclusive design selection, world-class artists, and quality production, makes people smile.

Sizing Chart:

Please check our sizing chart before you order.

Classic T-Shirt Fit:

This shirt is made for those of you that like a looser fitting shirt (classic seemed appropriate)! This t-shirt is made from the finest ring spun cotton to make you look Woot-astic!

  • Standard fit (slightly boxy t-shirt, a little loose)
  • Fiber Content: 4.5 oz/yd 100% Combed ring spun cotton
  • Manufactured In: Honduras
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA

Fitted T-Shirt Fit:

Our fitted t-shirts are made for those times when you want to feel slimmer — or when you want to go out on the town — or just because you like fitted shirts 'cause you're slim and stuff. This t-shirt is made from the finest ring spun cotton to make you look fit-astic (get it?)!

  • Fitted T-Shirt fit (narrower shoulder and body)
  • Fiber Content: 4.2 oz/yd 100% Combed ring spun cotton
  • Manufactured In: USA, Central America, Vietnam or Bangladesh
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA


Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
1m 21.000s
First Sucker:
Last Wooter to Woot:

Purchaser Experience

  • 0% first woot
  • 94% second woot
  • 6% < 10 woots
  • 0% < 25 woots
  • 0% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 12% joined today
  • 2% one week old
  • 4% one month old
  • 20% one year old
  • 61% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 94% bought 1
  • 5% bought 2
  • 1% bought 3 or more

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Percentage of Sales Per Day

Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat Sun

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If a tree falls in the woods by NomadSlim
$19.00 In Stock Apparel & Accessories
$19.00 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 15
Woot! Shirt.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.