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I’m So Sorry Elmer…

by jamescho84

$19.00 + free shipping
White
Tee
Limit 15 per customer
  • Standard - Estimated delivery Jun 28 - Jun 30
  • Express - Estimated delivery Jun 28
  • Free Express shipping for Prime members

I tried to axe you politely

If the good lord hadn’t meant for us to chop up our friends and burn them for heat, he wouldn’t have made them out of wood.

3rd place in Derby #78: Winter , with 885 votes!

I’m sorry, Elmer. There’s only so much winter weather a fellow can take. I needed to get the ol’ sap running again, you know? I wish there had been another way. You know I looked up to you. I mean, you’ve stood by me for years. We even cooperated on that hammock project for a while. But I was always kind of in your shadow, you know? I mean, you have to admit there’s always been this distance between us. After all, real friends don’t give each other cut-downs, right? But I tell you, Elmer—I’m finally really warming up to you. I’ll think of you every time I hear the Boss’s song “I’m On Fire,” or Blue Oyster Cult’s “Burnin’ For You,” or that Jimi Hendrix one about “let me stand… next to your…”

Oh, no; what have I done?

Wear this shirt: to split firewood, preferably at our house, where there’s tons of firewood to split, and we’re kind of tired of doing it ourselves.

Don’t wear this shirt: without several other layers when you come over to split our firewood. It’s January, you know.

This shirt tells the world: “My favorite tree is ash.”

We call this color: White Oak.

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Features

Our graphic tees are made for all those days (see every day) that you need to get shirt done! Our professionally printed t-shirts are produced in-house to create an experience you will never forget.

Seriously, our t-shirts have been a graphic tee loving enthusiast's favorite since 2007. Our t-shirt designs are created by the best artists in the industry. We know that the combination of our t-shirts, exclusive design selection, world-class artists, and quality production, makes people smile.

Sizing Chart:

Please check our sizing chart before you order.

Classic T-Shirt Fit:

This shirt is made for those of you that like a looser fitting shirt (classic seemed appropriate)! This t-shirt is made from the finest ring spun cotton to make you look Woot-astic!

  • Standard fit (slightly boxy t-shirt, a little loose)
  • Fiber Content: 4.5 oz/yd 100% Combed ring spun cotton
  • Manufactured In: Honduras
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA

Fitted T-Shirt Fit:

Our fitted t-shirts are made for those times when you want to feel slimmer — or when you want to go out on the town — or just because you like fitted shirts 'cause you're slim and stuff. This t-shirt is made from the finest ring spun cotton to make you look fit-astic (get it?)!

  • Fitted T-Shirt fit (narrower shoulder and body)
  • Fiber Content: 4.2 oz/yd 100% Combed ring spun cotton
  • Manufactured In: USA, Central America, Vietnam or Bangladesh
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA

Specs

Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
0m 24.000s
First Sucker:
indihar
Last Wooter to Woot:
donsamms

Purchaser Experience

  • 0% first woot
  • 96% second woot
  • 4% < 10 woots
  • 0% < 25 woots
  • 0% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 8% joined today
  • 2% one week old
  • 5% one month old
  • 42% one year old
  • 42% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 96% bought 1
  • 4% bought 2
  • 1% bought 3 or more

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

15%
7%
4%
2%
2%
1%
1%
3%
4%
6%
5%
5%
5%
5%
3%
3%
3%
3%
3%
3%
4%
3%
4%
4%
12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Percentage of Sales Per Day

1%
1%
1%
1%
1%
1%
94%
Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat Sun

Woots by State

zero wooters wootinglots of wooters wooting

Top Comments

What are Top Comments?

Top Comments are discussion forum posts we have deemed worthy of your time. Listen, we get a lot of comments, and most of the time, it's pretty forgettable stuff; but sometimes you rise to the top like butterfat in milk. We don't recommend you base your self-worth on how often we feature your comments, but we don't expressly forbid it either.

join the discussion (80 comments)
  • wootbot

    wootbot Got something of value to say? You'd be the first. Somebody, anybody, give us a quality post. We're dying here.

join the discussion (80 comments)

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I’m So Sorry Elmer… by jamescho84
$19.00 In Stock Apparel & Accessories
$19.00 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 15
Woot! Shirt.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.