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Krampuses!!!

by Theron Wallis

$19.00 + free shipping
Silver
Tee
Limit 15 per customer
  • Standard - Estimated delivery Jun 28 - Jun 30
  • Express - Estimated delivery Jun 28
  • Free Express shipping for Prime members

Let Krampuses be Krampuses

Back before all these overprotective parents took over, it was totally OK for malicious hoofed creatures to shove children in sacks and spirit them away to hidden mountain abodes. But these days…don't even think about it. All the fun has been taken out of Christmas by parents worried about their children being "absconded" by evil Krampuses. It's sad, really.

I remember back in the winter of 1973, Mike Bertsche and I were riding our bikes around the neighborhood (as kids were allowed to do back then). We were having a great time and kicking up all kinds of trouble, when out of nowhere this horrific fork-tongued monster tackled Mike off his Schwinn. Mike fought back, but the Krampus was impossibly strong, and shoved him violently into his burlap sack, blood streaking along the enclosure. I never saw Mike again.

And would I have had story like that to tell if I had grown up these days? No way! My mom probably would have insisted I stay inside where no child-abducting mythical beast could whisk me into the hills and perform who knows what kind of physical and sexual acts on me.

I guess those halcyon days are behind us forever. They're never coming back.

Wear this shirt: until this meme has run its natural course.

Don't wear this shirt: after this meme has run its natural course.

This shirt tells the world: "I want to take your children!! Oh hello, officer."

We call this color: Cover Your Child In Silver Bells So You Can Track Them

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Features

Our graphic tees are made for all those days (see every day) that you need to get shirt done! Our professionally printed t-shirts are produced in-house to create an experience you will never forget.

Seriously, our t-shirts have been a graphic tee loving enthusiast's favorite since 2007. Our t-shirt designs are created by the best artists in the industry. We know that the combination of our t-shirts, exclusive design selection, world-class artists, and quality production, makes people smile.

Sizing Chart:

Please check our sizing chart before you order.

Classic T-Shirt Fit:

This shirt is made for those of you that like a looser fitting shirt (classic seemed appropriate)! This t-shirt is made from the finest ring spun cotton to make you look Woot-astic!

  • Standard fit (slightly boxy t-shirt, a little loose)
  • Fiber Content: 4.5 oz/yd 100% Combed ring spun cotton
  • Manufactured In: Honduras
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA

Fitted T-Shirt Fit:

Our fitted t-shirts are made for those times when you want to feel slimmer — or when you want to go out on the town — or just because you like fitted shirts 'cause you're slim and stuff. This t-shirt is made from the finest ring spun cotton to make you look fit-astic (get it?)!

  • Fitted T-Shirt fit (narrower shoulder and body)
  • Fiber Content: 4.2 oz/yd 100% Combed ring spun cotton
  • Manufactured In: USA, Central America, Vietnam or Bangladesh
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA

Specs

Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
2m 7.551s
First Sucker:
mrmopar440
Last Wooter to Woot:
misterchtistian3

Purchaser Experience

  • 0% first woot
  • 90% second woot
  • 10% < 10 woots
  • 0% < 25 woots
  • 0% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 11% joined today
  • 1% one week old
  • 2% one month old
  • 10% one year old
  • 76% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 90% bought 1
  • 8% bought 2
  • 2% bought 3 or more

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

6%
3%
2%
1%
1%
4%
4%
8%
8%
8%
6%
6%
4%
4%
4%
3%
3%
3%
3%
3%
3%
3%
3%
8%
12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Percentage of Sales Per Day

8%
3%
3%
77%
4%
3%
3%
Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat Sun

Woots by State

zero wooters wootinglots of wooters wooting

Top Comments

What are Top Comments?

Top Comments are discussion forum posts we have deemed worthy of your time. Listen, we get a lot of comments, and most of the time, it's pretty forgettable stuff; but sometimes you rise to the top like butterfat in milk. We don't recommend you base your self-worth on how often we feature your comments, but we don't expressly forbid it either.

join the discussion (49 comments)
join the discussion (49 comments)

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Krampuses!!! by Theron Wallis
$19.00 In Stock Apparel & Accessories
$19.00 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 15
Woot! Shirt.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.