Problems? We all got problems. Hell, I just realized I’m some kind of gelatinous cylinder with disproportionately tiny limbs. You think that’s gonna stop me?

Maybe you got a black eye, a band-aid on your head, a heart dripping red goo all over your hands, or a body shaped like Pac-Man’s spermatozoa. Or maybe you got all of it put together. Point is, so what? You gotta let go of all that. You gotta put it aside and focus on that giant 8-ball you’ve been dreaming of, or that pencil, or that checkerboard. If you let every minor injury or major injury or physical deformity get you down, you might as well climb into that coffin right now because whatever you’re doing, brothers and sisters, it ain’t living.

Wear this shirt: to remind yourself to relax and forget about all the money you waste on t-shirts.

Don’t wear this shirt: and expect it to solve all of your problems. That’s going to take a whole lot more of our t-shirts.

This shirt tells the world: “I’m wide-eyed enough, I’m chubby enough, and gosh darn it, monsters like me.”

We call this color: You’ve Got So Much Olive For.

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