Hi there. Get stranded in the Alpines often?

Alright, Murray. I’ve been working on this novelty bar pitch all weekend and I think I’ve really got an idea that’ll wow you this time.

What if we create a bar in the Swiss Alps that doesn’t require a bar at all? Instead, we get people to pay us for the privilege of being trapped on a mountain for a few hours to be served by our very own trained “rescue dog” bartenders! You follow me? We can, I don’t know, stage an avalanche every hour, maybe have some food specials with names indicative of eating other survivors brought out by guys in yeti costumes… I’m telling you, the possibilities with this idea are endless! And the money we save in not having to pay actual bartenders, we can use on a rescue helicopter to take the patrons back to their cars! Think of the Internet buzz!

Yeah, okay, the insurance on the business might be a killer. Maybe we only do the avalanche thing every couple of hours. Would that help?

Wear this shirt: as you await the sweet rescue of Happy Hour. NO, NOT THAT ONE.

Don’t wear this shirt: if even the casting of Charles Grodin couldn’t help you enjoy the Beethoven movies.

This shirt tells the world: “What’s the trouble, girl? Timmy needs a dry martini?”

We call this color: Old Whiter

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