They are the very model of a loudly vocal minority: “Why doesn’t Shirt.Woot sell more artistic grownup-type shirts?”

A cartoon penguin gives them fits. Nintendo gags make them gag with bile. They are the sworn enemies of all things cutesy. They’ll tell anyone who listens about our acute lack of taste. To them, slogan t-shirts are the moral equivalent of genocide. And don’t get them started on the Derby.

But it’s funny… when we do commission a daily shirt with a more considered, refined aesthetic approach – like this one, Van Goghkusai botanicalesque waves – there’s nobody here but us crickets. The cute stuff flies off the shelves like marshmallow pegasi. The cartoony shirts move faster than Tom after a hotfoot from Jerry. But when we throw the art supremacists a bone, they barely give it a nibble.

So this is your chance. If you’ve had your fill of the adorable cannibal-animals and the anthropomorphic vegetables, here’s your chance to step up or shut up – all in the name of art, of course.

Wear this shirt: to show the rest of us that you wouldn’t be caught dead wearing a robot cartoon.

Don’t wear this shirt: while you’re surfing. Because it’s lame to wear a shirt while you’re surfing. Unless you’re just web surfing, in which case a shirt is required.

This shirt tells the world: “My cultural memory extends back even further than Pong.”

We call this color: Asphalt Surface.

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