Of course it’s alive. Why wouldn’t it be?

Eukaryotes have one cell, and we consider them life. Sponges have lots of cells and we consider them life, even if only life used in the bathroom to wipe away the eukaryotes that are messing up the tile. Little teeny bugs have millions of cells, and we certainly consider them life. Who among us hasn’t yelled “I’LL KILL YOU WHEN I FIND YOU” to an irritating mosquito?

So why then is it so hard to imagine that a city, made up of millions of people, is any less alive? It has to consume, it has to excrete, it has areas that go bad and areas that thrive, the orders come from City Hall, the food comes through the shipping port, there’s a circulation system of pipes and streets and if you’re in the wrong sports jersey, you’re treated like an allergen.

Just because you can’t see the invisible hands doesn’t mean they aren’t guiding you.

Wear this shirt: if your apartment is in the middle of a skyscraper and you’re being followed. Who would guess that your shirt would also be a map? It’s an ingenious double-bluff!

Don’t wear this shirt: upside down. Then it would look more like purple-blue mountains against the night sky. Also, you’d have your waist through the neck hole and that’s just never going to be fashionable. If it hasn’t happened in the last two thousand years, it’s not going to happen.

This shirt tells the world: “What do you mean, my policy doesn’t cover fresh moon drippings? I’m going to have to redo the whole roof!”

We call this color: Asphalt Asphalt Everywhere So A Drop To Drink Costs $9.50. It’s Just Part Of City Living.

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