3rd place in Derby #123: Christmas & Holiday Songs Illustrated with 749 votes!

HEY! HEY YOU UP THERE! Would you mind knocking it off? We’re trying to find a kid down here!

What do mean you were just trying to help? Huh? No, no, no, I think you got it wrong there, pally. The word is “holy”, as in “sacred”? It’s supposed to be a HOLY night, not, you know, what you’re doing there to the sky with your scissors and your wrecking everything. You must’ve gotten confused because it’s a homonym. A HOMONYM! YES, WE’RE SURE! We’re Wise Men, after all. You’d think we of all people would know, wouldn’t you?

Look, would you just fix the sky, please?! We’d been following the same star for ages until you came up and cut out the piece it was in. YES, IT IS SORT OF IMPORTANT. Jiminy Christmas, can you believe this guy? Sits up there for half the day and doesn’t know what a… YES, MR. SUN, ALL OF THE HOLES NEED FIXING. NO, WE DON’T HAPPEN TO HAVE ANY TAPE WITH US. Unless you can fix it with gold, myrrh, or this frankin-whoozle Murray brought with him, we can’t help you there, buddy.

Wear this shirt: during the season, making sure to point at the print and demanding to know whether or not someone “gets it”.

Don’t wear this shirt: to Midnight Mass choir practice. I’m not Catholic, but I hear some of those nuns can be humorless and mean.

This shirt tells the world: “So there’s a hole in the ozone layer. Could be worse, you know.”

We call this color: It’s Not Asphalt, He Just Misunderstood

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