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One Line One Horn

by Truffleshuffle

$19.00 + free shipping
Royal Blue
Limit 15 per customer
  • Standard - Estimated delivery Oct 31 - Nov 01
  • Express - Estimated delivery Oct 30
  • Free Express shipping for Prime members

Choose Your Own Theology

3rd place in Derby #266: Single Line, Guest Editor Artulo's Pick!

I'm just telling you it's what I'd prefer to believe.

"But it's nonsensical!"

"Is it? Is it any more nonsensical to believe that there's a giant, ambivalent unicorn in the sky who may or may not have created us but definitely does not interfere in our affairs or really even acknowledge our existence?"



"Because no one believes that!"

"I do."

"But it makes no sense! Where does your morality come from?"

"The same place it always has. Myself. I do good things because it feels right, and I want people to treat me nicely in return."

"But how will the evil be punished if your sky unicorn is so ambivalent?!"

"The same way they are now: by the laws we enact and the police and judges that serve and protect us. The sky unicorn doesn't really enter into any of that stuff."

"But you have no guarantee of eternal reward for a life well-lived! You have no guarantee that those who transgress shall be punished for eternity!"

"Yeah, but…neither do you. You just believe that's what happens. The same as me just believing in an ambivalent sky unicorn."

"I- Well- You-"

"Besides, have you really sat and thought about ETERNITY? I don't know if there's anything I would want to go on forever. It kind of kills the appeal. I'll stick with the unicorn, but no hard feelings."

Wear this shirt: While videotaping yourself posing. Make sure "Goodbye Horses" is playing in the background.

Don't wear this shirt: If you remember that scene from The Cabin in the Woods.

This shirt tells the world: "I feel a kinship with androgynous, mythical beasts."

We call this color: Royal Bluenicorn

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Our graphic tees are made for all those days (see every day) that you need to get shirt done! Our professionally printed t-shirts are produced in-house to create an experience you will never forget.

Seriously, our t-shirts have been a graphic tee loving enthusiast's favorite since 2007. Our t-shirt designs are created by the best artists in the industry. We know that the combination of our t-shirts, exclusive design selection, world-class artists, and quality production, makes people smile.

Sizing Chart:

Please check our sizing chart before you order.

Classic T-Shirt Fit:

This shirt is made for those of you that like a looser fitting shirt (classic seemed appropriate)! This t-shirt is made from the finest ring spun cotton to make you look Woot-astic!

  • Standard fit (slightly boxy t-shirt, a little loose)
  • Fiber Content: 4.5 oz/yd 100% Combed ring spun cotton
  • Manufactured In: Honduras
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA

Fitted T-Shirt Fit:

Our fitted t-shirts are made for those times when you want to feel slimmer — or when you want to go out on the town — or just because you like fitted shirts 'cause you're slim and stuff. This t-shirt is made from the finest ring spun cotton to make you look fit-astic (get it?)!

  • Fitted T-Shirt fit (narrower shoulder and body)
  • Fiber Content: 4.2 oz/yd 100% Combed ring spun cotton
  • Manufactured In: USA, Central America, Vietnam or Bangladesh
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA


Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
1m 17.336s
First Sucker:
Last Wooter to Woot:

Purchaser Experience

  • 0% first woot
  • 94% second woot
  • 6% < 10 woots
  • 0% < 25 woots
  • 0% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 7% joined today
  • 0% one week old
  • 3% one month old
  • 21% one year old
  • 69% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 94% bought 1
  • 4% bought 2
  • 1% bought 3 or more

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Percentage of Sales Per Day

Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat Sun

Woots by State

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One Line One Horn by Truffleshuffle
$19.00 In Stock Apparel & Accessories
$19.00 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 15
Woot! Shirt.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.