Oh, er… we were… that is…

I mean, you were out, I thought! Um, you know banana, right? We were just… listening to some Elvis records and… listen, banana, it was great to see you but you probably should be… I’ll call you, okay?

Look, it’s not like… what? I mean, this wasn’t something I planned or anything, you know! It’s not like you and toast… yeah, I knew about that! Hey, maybe it is and maybe it isn’t but whatever it is, it’s the same as me and banana. And anyway, we were open faced, you know? It’s not like you came in and caught me wrapped up in a chocolate candy shell. Oh, yes, I’ve heard all about your college days, don’t play the prude. I had a friend you might remember, a fellow named sponge cake roll? He tells some stories, all right. Apparently you and your friend marmalade weren’t always spread with two different knives if you understand.

Look, baby, I don’t want to fight about this. Maybe it’s my fault too. What’s important is, we’ve talked about it, and we can move on. Hey, why don’t I get some wheat bread and you and me can- really? You’re still stuck on this? Man, I knew I never should have broken up with that stalk of celery.

Wear this shirt: without the crusts.

Don’t wear this shirt: cut into rectangles. Everybody knows triangles are the way to go.

This shirt tells the world: “She’s home! Banana! You gotta split!”

We call this color: I Was Pretty Wild In My Navy Days But Now I’m Really Thinking About Settling Down For Good

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