Stripes and swirls and stars and swirly stripes are busting out all over this nuevo-retro tee. We can't shake the vague feeling that we saw this design on a Bicentennial t-shirt back in 1976, or maybe in an animated version on Sesame Street back before Gordon lost his hair. If anybody asks for us, we'll be lost somewhere in this shirt's  infinite line-drawing curlicues, on a long, strange journey to the center of the torso. Don't send a search party.

Wear this shirt: to cloud the minds of your enemies.

Don't wear this shirt: back in time to 1976, because then people will never believe that you came from the future. We'd recommend one of those oversized satin button-up shirts with a giant full-bleed print of a tiger  or a dragon or something. Nobody in 1976 had taste anywhere near that bad.

This shirt tells the world: "Turn off your mind, relax, and float into my shirt."

We call this color: A Paler Shade of White.

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