1st place in Derby #237: Fish Out of Water, with 932 votes!
Okay, no funny faces, guys. Yes, I’m talking to you, Mars. I know you like being the center of attention and everything, but this isn’t all about you today. This is about family.
Speaking of which, I don’t mean to make you feel awkward, but Pluto, could you step out of the frame? Thanks.
Okay, Jupiter, you need to move to the back. You’re blocking your brothers and sisters. And Saturn, please show some modesty and pull up your ring a little bit, okay? I mean, we’re going to show this to your grandmother after all. Uranus, that’s gross. C’mon. Turn around and pull your pants up, RIGHT NOW. And Neptune, stop laughing! It only encourages him!
Pluto. Please step out of the frame. I don’t want to have to ask you again…
VENUS! GET DOWN HERE! IT SHOULDN’T TAKE 40 FRIGGIN MINUTES TO PUT ON MAKEUP FOR A FAMILY PHOTO! HURRY UP! YOUR LITTLE BROTHER MERCURY IS ABOUT TO HAVE ONE OF HIS MOOD SWINGS AGAIN! Ah, there you are, dear. Looking beautiful as always!
Alright, now everyone stand still. I said still, Earth! Oh really, you’re covered with life? And it’s constantly in motion? I had no idea. It’s not like you talk about it EVERY SINGLE DAY! But seriously, don’t you have the Downton Abbey season finale or something you could throw on to distract people for a minute? Thanks!
Alright, now everyone say cheese on three. One, Two… Oh guys, stop! You don’t want me in the picture! Really? You do? Oh, that is just too sweet! I guess I could set a timer… or, wait! Pluto, you’re not doing anything…
Wear this shirt: to show coach that you belong in the rotation!
Don’t wear this shirt: to the planetarium. They have no sense of humor about this sort of thing.
This shirt tells the world: “I may be mercurial, but I always manage to pull myself together.”
We call this color: Navy IN SSSSSPPPPPAAAACCCCCEEEEE
Back to top
