Sometimes we soar high above the playground on the wings of our super-powered dreams. Other times reality rushes up at us like pavement, and we leave an us-shaped indentation in the schoolyard of our lives. Locked in a never-ending struggle with the forces of gravity, all of us learn to accept being Earthbound. But are we really any wiser than the unspoiled child who still dreams of soaring through the clouds? Of course we are. People can't fly.

This shirt was designed by: Shirt.Woot member jamescho84, who manfully assumed the champion's mantle when the most popular entry in Derby #3 proved unable to carry out its duties.

Wear this shirt to: warn aspiring heroes with a cautionary yet cute tale of adorably Icarian hubris.

Don’t wear this shirt to: a job interview, unless it's at a daycare or a comic store.

This shirt tells the world: "I can leap into the emergency room in a single bound."

We call this color: Unforgiving Asphalt.

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