3rd place in Derby #164: Prehistoric Art, with 550 votes!

Hey, that Flintstone cat is always bragging about how he jumps back in the window and locks his fat owner outside at night. Me? I like to be an outdoor sabertooth. All the good stuff is out there! You just go down to the malt shop and look cute and somebody’s gonna give you a burger. Mmmm, burgers.

All those cats who sit around inside all day, acting like they’re getting away with something. I’ll tell you what they’re getting away with. They’re getting away with dry food and a basic healthy diet. Great, they’ll live to be sixteen or something. Me? I’m gonna have a really delicious five year lifespan of eating and hunting and maybe hanging out at the drag race. Yeah, some people think I’m lucky because they always run faster at the start when I’m there. I don’t think it’s me, but whatever. If it gets me another patty, they can think whatever they want.

Wear this shirt: when you’re going out for burgers. Instead of ordering, you can just point at your shirt and hope that the cashier spends a lot of time on the Internet!

Don’t wear this shirt: around vegan dogs. It won’t end well.

This shirt tells the world: “Even the oldest joke is new to somebody… but not me, so don’t even try.”

We call this color: Surplus Navy Cheese And Grade D Beef With Tons Of Special Sauce

Back to top