Ha! Pathetic! Look at you, Curt Potts, with your sad little bean-sprout display. Hey, Kelly McCardle – you like to think you’re pretty hot stuff, but nobody’s impressed by your “what temperature makes an egg float longest?” routine. And the less said about that bizarre exploration of bird-attracting odors, Nick Ridhaus, the better. 364 days of the year, you are the overlords of the school…but today is Science Fair day! And once my super-powered mice are finished impressing the judges, I shall command them to turn their wrath on your thrown-together mockeries of the scientific process! The ranks of lesser cardboard-box displays will be reduced to a smoking ruin! It’ll be satisfying for personal reasons, to be sure…but I’ll also be doing science a favor.

This shirt was designed by: San Diego designer Philip Tseng, who wants you to know that, quote, “Nerds are cool.” Especially nerds with an army of energy-blasting mice at their command.

Wear this shirt: to let the judges know that you won’t let the school down if they send you to the regionals.

Don’t wear this shirt: to the regionals. Score-grubbing is frowned upon at the higher levels of competitive science.

This shirt tells the world: “Attack, my pretties!”

We call this color: Asphalt Ribbon.

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