2nd place in Derby #151: Shirt You’d Wear to a Job Interview , with 744 votes!

Jack, great, please, come in, have a seat, get comfortable, help yourself to a comma. So, basically, the reason that I called you, you know, in to my office, is because, well, there’s no easy way to say this. In a +3 nutshell of closure, we’re converting the office to 4th Edition rules, and I’d like to go over your resume.

Well, Jack, we can’t say just yet what the long term plans are going to be. All I can say now is that we’re trying to eliminate redundancies, but also allow for backup plans. I can tell you that, based on this sheet, your stats aren’t going to be affected at all, but there might be some issue with the magic items. Of course, if it were up to me, you know, we wouldn’t even be doing this, but, you have to understand, my hands are well and truly tied.

Okay, so, let’s get down to masterwork tacks. I think I can persuade HR to allow for your Desk Set Of Lordly Might, but for that to happen, they’re gonna need a show of good faith. Like, say, taking off that stupid t-shirt you always wear. What? No? What do you mean, no? Listen, if you don’t play ball, I can’t go to bat for you, okay? Still no? CURSE YOU, ADVENTURER! I, THE GITHYANKI OVERSEER, HAVE FAILED IN MY ATTEMPT TO KEEP YOU FROM YOUR MOST POWERFUL OF MAGICS! BUT KNOW THIS, FOOL! OUR EPIC BATTLE HAS NOT YET ENDED! AND I SHALL ONE DAY TERMINATE YOU… WITHOUT SEVERANCE PAY! AHAHAHA! AHAHAHAHAHA! Okay, Jack, thanks, I guess you can go. Oh, and when you get a second, ask the paladin if he can step in here, would you?

Wear this shirt: if you get a show right after Jay Leno. Hey, Fallon, call us, maybe we can hook you up.

Don’t wear this shirt: at a 31+ Singles Night BBQ Party. You’ll end up defenseless and also there will be rib sauce on your runes.

This shirt tells the world: “Um… I think the intern did that?”

We call this color: And If You Roll A One, At Least You Can Still Join The Navy

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