“So that’s how the solar system works. Any questions?”

“Dad.”

“What? What’s the problem? Just write all that down and you’ll get your A or S or whatever. It’s not like they actually fail kids anymore.”

“BUT IT DOESN’T MAKE ANY SENSE.”

“Oh, and I guess your fancy ‘gravity’ is that much easier to explain, hmmm?”

“But if the sun is so hot, how come we don’t burn up when it throws us back up, huh?”

“Easy. That’s because we’re going so fast. Besides, why do you think it gets so hot in the Summer? And Winter happens when we’re at the top of the…”

“But why a unicycle, Dad? Why?”

“Son, there are some things in the universe we don’t yet understand. Maybe one day we’ll know all the answers, though. Now hurry up and finish your homework. Your mother won’t let me play your video games until you’re done.”

Wear this shirt: while multi-tasking.

Don’t wear this shirt: if you believe in the pre-Galilean idea that it is the Earth that should be juggling.

This shirt tells the world: “He’s not that good a juggler, really. I heard he dropped one a while back because it was too small.”

We call this color: The Center of Navy-Tee

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