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Swiss Cheese

by David Schwen (dschwen)

$19.00 + free shipping
Limit 15 per customer
  • Standard - Estimated delivery Nov 25 - Nov 26
  • Express - Estimated delivery Nov 22
  • Free Express shipping for Prime members

Holy Cross

“Johann! Marco! Ring the alarm! Close the city gates! Someone has taken the cross off the official flag again!”

”’Taken’, Philippe? ‘Taken’? That’s cute, but say what we all know: someone has eaten the cross off the flag.”

“This is not the time to start this again.”

“It’s never the time, is it? It’s never the right time to point out that our flag will keep getting defaced like this as long as we’re stupid enough to make it partially edible. No, no, scratch that – partially delicious.”

“Look, the flag is like an advertisement for your country. We’d be crazy not to put cheese on there. It’s one of the things we do best.”

“I just know that this never happens to Croatia or Belgium. Nobody in Denmark ever wakes up to find that their national symbol has been devoured. Again.”

“OK, then, what’s your bright idea?”

“We replace the cheese cross with a chocolate cross. We’re also renowned for our chocolate, why not put it front and center?”

“But that’s absurd. It wouldn’t go five minutes without someone eating-”

“Ah-HA! So you admit that an edible emblem is a bad idea!”

“Fine. Fine. We’ll try just painting a white cross on. But we’ve got to find some other way of getting the word out about our cheese.”

“Oh, don’t worry about that. I’m working on a deal with the cartoon industry. Generations of children will grow up thinking all cheese has holes in it.”

Wear this shirt: if you slice your cheese with your army knife.

Don’t wear this shirt: beyond the point where the shirt itself starts to get holes in it. That would be conceptually ambiguous.

This shirt tells the world: “The cheese has eyes.”

We call this color: Red Isn’t A Neutral Color.

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Our graphic tees are made for all those days (see every day) that you need to get shirt done! Our professionally printed t-shirts are produced in-house to create an experience you will never forget.

Seriously, our t-shirts have been a graphic tee loving enthusiast's favorite since 2007. Our t-shirt designs are created by the best artists in the industry. We know that the combination of our t-shirts, exclusive design selection, world-class artists, and quality production, makes people smile.

Sizing Chart:

Please check our sizing chart before you order.

Classic T-Shirt Fit:

This shirt is made for those of you that like a looser fitting shirt (classic seemed appropriate)! This t-shirt is made from the finest ring spun cotton to make you look Woot-astic!

  • Standard fit (slightly boxy t-shirt, a little loose)
  • Fiber Content: 4.5 oz/yd 100% Combed ring spun cotton
  • Manufactured In: Honduras
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA

Fitted T-Shirt Fit:

Our fitted t-shirts are made for those times when you want to feel slimmer — or when you want to go out on the town — or just because you like fitted shirts 'cause you're slim and stuff. This t-shirt is made from the finest ring spun cotton to make you look fit-astic (get it?)!

  • Fitted T-Shirt fit (narrower shoulder and body)
  • Fiber Content: 4.2 oz/yd 100% Combed ring spun cotton
  • Manufactured In: USA, Central America, Vietnam or Bangladesh
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA


Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
1m 42.000s
First Sucker:
Last Wooter to Woot:

Purchaser Experience

  • 0% first woot
  • 90% second woot
  • 10% < 10 woots
  • 0% < 25 woots
  • 0% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 8% joined today
  • 1% one week old
  • 3% one month old
  • 24% one year old
  • 64% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 90% bought 1
  • 8% bought 2
  • 2% bought 3 or more

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Percentage of Sales Per Day

Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat Sun

Woots by State

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Swiss Cheese by David Schwen (dschwen)
$19.00 In Stock Apparel & Accessories
$19.00 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 15
Woot! Shirt.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.