The Evil That Men Do Except Instead Of Men It’s A Kite

by Adam Koford (aka ApeLad)

$11.00–$14.00

Printed to order.

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Monster Knot

Kites were invented as a weapon, you know.

The Chinese used kites to take control of the skies, back when the skies weren’t something it was very easy to control. Sure, these days we’ve got too many F-22s, but back then, teams of men were working around the clock to figure out how to tie tissue paper to wood. And some general was slamming his fist on the desk and yelling “I don’t care how many men it takes! You get me a kite!” Only he probably didn’t call it a kite because it was China and plus they wouldn’t have even named it yet.

So when you’re out enjoying a fun day in a windy park, keep in mind how many thousands of millions of people died because of this deadly, deadly monster. Would you play landmine baseball? Well, okay, that does sound kind of cool. But what about poison gas tennis? Wow, that’s kinda a good idea too. Okay, you know what? Let’s forget all that Lady Diana crap and just go nuts with the weapons. You get a tank, we’ll get a helicopter, that old tree has a force field and it’s the base, and… what time is it? Okay, we play for an hour and then switch teams. Everybody think that’s fair?

Wear this shirt: daa datda daaa dat daa datdat daa daa, daa dat da daaa dat daa dat daa daa, daa datda daaa dat daa datdat daa daa, wear this shirt when it’s windy.

Don’t wear this shirt: if you don’t wish to be part of that sort of Association.

This shirt tells the world: “OH GOD WHY DIDN’T I JUST BUY A BALSA WOOD GLIDER”

We call this color: Olive By The Kite, Odie By The Kite

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Features

Pantone Colors:
White - 210C - 4675C- 258C - Cool Gray 8C- Black

Standard Brand:

  • Standard fit (slightly boxy, a little loose)
  • Fiber Content: 4.5 oz 100% Combed Ringspun Cotton
  • Manufactured In: Honduras/Nicaragua
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA

American Apparel:

  • Slimmer fit (if you like a looser fit, order one size up from your usual size)
  • Fiber Content: 4.3 oz 100% Combed Ringspun Cotton
  • Manufactured In: USA
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA

Sizing Chart:
Please check our sizing chart before you order.

Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
0m 19.000s
First Sucker:
adamatus786
Last Wooter to Woot:
abijwe

Purchaser Experience

  • 0% first woot
  • 95% second woot
  • 5% < 10 woots
  • 0% < 25 woots
  • 0% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 15% joined today
  • 1% one week old
  • 7% one month old
  • 38% one year old
  • 39% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 95% bought 1
  • 4% bought 2
  • 1% bought 3 or more

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

13%
6%
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1%
2%
5%
6%
7%
7%
6%
5%
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3%
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3%
4%
2%
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12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Percentage of Sales Per Day

94%
1%
1%
1%
1%
2%
1%
Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat Sun

Woots by State

zero wooters wootinglots of wooters wooting

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The Evil That Men Do Except Instead Of Men It’s A Kite by Adam Koford (aka ApeLad)
$11.00 In Stock Apparel & Accessories
$11.00 $14.00 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 15
Woot! Shirt.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.