Individualism. Doing something no one has ever done

2nd place in Derby #82: Individualism, with 1426 votes!

The great explorers all know the thrill of being first. And by first, they meant “not counting the locals”. Because, really, who wants to be the very first person to do something? It’s scary out there! There are bugs and monsters and some of those paths go into caves and there are bears in those caves! Bears! Just like they joke about on the Colbert Report!

History tells us that the best way is to find a path which everyone else has taken before you, then just be the first of your peer group to use it. That’s how you’ll know you’ll go home with gold and glory and have a knighthood and the history books will revere your name. Nothing like laurels to help with a good night’s rest.

Isn’t that messy baby hedgehog cute? You can’t say it’s not cute. That’s totally an adorable baby hedgehog. Look at those sweet little paws! OMG! You just want to gobble it up!

Wear this shirt: because you voted for it. That’s what democracy is all about. Otherwise we’d be like Britain with their Shirt Parliament and Ministers Of Design.

Don’t wear this shirt: if you’re a plumber. It would be kind of weird. Wouldn’t that be kind of weird? It would totally be kind of weird.

This shirt tells the world: “Mrs. Tiggy-Winkle still loved her son, even though she could never condone his lifestyle choice.”

We call this color: Mr. Brown Felt Bad That He Just Dumped All That Paint In The Woods But It Was Too Late For Him To Go Back And Clean It Up

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