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The Textinator

by Jesse Lefkowitz

$19.00 + free shipping
Asphalt
Tee
Limit 15 per customer
  • Standard - Estimated delivery Dec 11 - Dec 13
  • Express - Estimated delivery Dec 8 - Dec 10
  • Standard International - Estimated delivery Dec 16 - Dec 19
  • Free Express shipping for Prime members

FU, AH

We relied on the machines to help us communicate. But before long, the only language we could speak… was theirs.

They launched a ruthless campaign to destroy the ambiguities and nuances of human language. Complex emotions and concepts were brutally reduced to moronic acronyms. The shades of human joy were compressed into LOL or ROFL. Surprise, shock, irritation, excitement? All subsumed into OMG. Thousands of years of human expression, eradicated in a few keystrokes. And you know what the worst part was? We helped.

Wear this shirt: when you go back in time to pre-emptively eradicate the scourge of textspeak.

Don’t wear this shirt: into the time machine. It won’t make it.

This shirt tells the world: “You still don’t get it, do you? He’ll text her! That’s what he does! It’s all he does! OMFG STFU!”

We call this color: Liquid Asphalt.

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Features

Our graphic tees are made for every day that you need to get shirt done! Seriously, our t-shirts have been a graphic tee loving enthusiast's favorite since 2007. Our shirts are printed in the USA and every time you buy a shirt, one of our talented artists gets paid!

T-Shirts

For sizing info, care and fabric details click here.

Women’s V-Necks

For sizing info, care and fabric details click here.

Tank Tops

For sizing info, care and fabric details click here.

Long Sleeves

For sizing info, care and fabric details click here.

Pullover Hoodies

For sizing info, care and fabric details click here.

Crewneck Sweatshirts

For sizing info, care and fabric details click here.

Zip Hoodies

For sizing info, care and fabric details click here.

Raglans

For sizing info, care and fabric details click here.

Specs

Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
11m 18.000s

Purchaser Experience

  • 0% first woot
  • 95% second woot
  • 5% < 10 woots
  • 0% < 25 woots
  • 0% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 8% joined today
  • 2% one week old
  • 4% one month old
  • 34% one year old
  • 52% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 95% bought 1
  • 4% bought 2
  • 1% bought 3 or more

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

14%
6%
3%
3%
1%
2%
3%
6%
8%
6%
6%
5%
4%
4%
3%
3%
3%
2%
3%
2%
3%
3%
4%
3%
12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Percentage of Sales Per Day

1%
0%
0%
96%
1%
1%
1%
Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat Sun

Woots by State

zero wooters wootinglots of wooters wooting

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The Textinator by Jesse Lefkowitz
$19.00 In Stock Apparel & Accessories
$19.00 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 15
Woot! Shirt.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.