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There Is No Escape

by Jakub Gruber

$19.00 + free shipping
Limit 15 per customer
  • Standard - Estimated delivery Sep 26 - Sep 28
  • Express - Estimated delivery Sep 26
  • Free Express shipping for Prime members

Quite The Artist

In this excerpt from the last known interview before his untimely demise, ESC attempts to explain why his act remains so popular after so many years.

“Well, it’s something we all wish to do at some point or another, isn’t it? To escape? To free ourselves from the bonds of that which shackles us into some routine that makes us unresponsive to the world around us?

When I am on stage with my lovely assistants Ctrl and Alt, or Command and Option, depending on the region, I am not merely a button locked away in a glass prison full of water. I am that man in the audience who is wasting away at a thankless job. I am that woman struggling in a loveless marriage that staring down at me from the balcony. I am the child desperately yearning to break the bonds of youth watching wide-eyed from Row Four. There is a moment there, as they watch me fight against the chains, where the trick and its complications mean nothing to the audience, you see. In that moment, all that matters is that I can prove to them that someone facing such adversity can overcome it and emerge unscathed. That is why the applause was always so uproarious, night after night.

Why is my act still so popular, you ask? Maybe it’s because I helped them to pause, to close life’s windows on the mundane for a bit and enjoy the fantastic. I suppose that’s true enough. But I like to believe that the reason my little tricks hold so firmly in the public mind is that I gave them hope.”

Wear this shirt: while weaving your own magic from behind your keyboard.

Don’t wear this shirt: if your cubicle is confining enough as it is.

This shirt tells the world: “For my next trick, I’m going to make IE6 disappear.”

We call this color: Nothing Up Our Silver

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Our graphic tees are made for all those days (see every day) that you need to get shirt done! Our professionally printed t-shirts are produced in-house to create an experience you will never forget.

Seriously, our t-shirts have been a graphic tee loving enthusiast's favorite since 2007. Our t-shirt designs are created by the best artists in the industry. We know that the combination of our t-shirts, exclusive design selection, world-class artists, and quality production, makes people smile.

Sizing Chart:

Please check our sizing chart before you order.

Classic T-Shirt Fit:

This shirt is made for those of you that like a looser fitting shirt (classic seemed appropriate)! This t-shirt is made from the finest ring spun cotton to make you look Woot-astic!

  • Standard fit (slightly boxy t-shirt, a little loose)
  • Fiber Content: 4.5 oz/yd 100% Combed ring spun cotton
  • Manufactured In: Honduras
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA

Fitted T-Shirt Fit:

Our fitted t-shirts are made for those times when you want to feel slimmer — or when you want to go out on the town — or just because you like fitted shirts 'cause you're slim and stuff. This t-shirt is made from the finest ring spun cotton to make you look fit-astic (get it?)!

  • Fitted T-Shirt fit (narrower shoulder and body)
  • Fiber Content: 4.2 oz/yd 100% Combed ring spun cotton
  • Manufactured In: USA, Central America, Vietnam or Bangladesh
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA


Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
1m 39.000s
First Sucker:
Last Wooter to Woot:

Purchaser Experience

  • 0% first woot
  • 94% second woot
  • 6% < 10 woots
  • 0% < 25 woots
  • 0% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 8% joined today
  • 2% one week old
  • 4% one month old
  • 25% one year old
  • 61% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 94% bought 1
  • 5% bought 2
  • 1% bought 3 or more

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Percentage of Sales Per Day

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There Is No Escape by Jakub Gruber
$19.00 In Stock Apparel & Accessories
$19.00 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 15
Woot! Shirt.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.