That’s not very clever, girl.

“What’s their growth rate?”

They’re lethal at eight months, and I do mean lethal: deadly, baleful, dangerous, deathly, destructive, fatal, malignant, pernicious, mortiferous-

“I get it.”

I’ve hunted most things that can hunt you, but the way these things move…it’s astonishing, bewildering, impressive, stupefying, dumbfounding, staggering-

“Okay, okay. Are they fast for a biped?”

Cheetah speed. Fifty, sixty miles an hour if they ever got out into the open, absconded, bailed out, bolted, cut and run, decamped, fled, played hooky-

“Yeah, I see your meaning.”

They’re astonishing jumpers.

”...”

What?

“Well? Aren’t you going to leap into a succession of synonyms for “astonishing?”

I already did that one.

“Ugh, fine. Do they show intelligence?”

They show extraordinary intelligence.

”...”

No, I feel like “astonishing” covers that, too. Anyway, when the big one came in she took over the pride and killed all but two of the others. That one…when she looks at you, you can tell she’s working things out, percolating, mulling over, musing, ruminating, speculating, deliberating, chewing over-

“Holy CRAP I cannot wait for you to get eaten.”

Wear this shirt: If you want to strike up a conversation with your English teacher.

Don’t wear this shirt: If you already get picked on for being brainy.

This shirt tells the world: “SHOOT HER! BLAST HER! UNLEASH A BARRAGE UPON HER! FIRE ON HER! LET FLY YOUR BULLETS IN HER DIRECTION! PULL THE TRIGGER WHILE AIMING YOUR FIREARM AT HER! MURDER HER!”

We call this color: Something More Creative Than Just “Baby Blue”  

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