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Two Queens

by patrickspens

$19.00 + free shipping
Brown
Tee
Limit 15 per customer
  • Standard - Estimated delivery Dec 01 - Dec 02
  • Express - Estimated delivery Nov 29
  • Free Express shipping for Prime members

With apologies to that tantric doofus

2nd place in Derby #197: Royalty, with 888 votes!

We’re through the looking glass here, people.

There’s another t-shirt on our site today
That’s the same thing that happens here every day
There’s the Queen of Hearts with her image mirrored
But there’s something about it which is downright weird

Her reflection’s appearance should be just like hers
Well, except in the mirror everything’s reversed
But the image she sees there in the glass displayed
Belongs, for some reason, to the Queen of Spades

There is something about this that is not quite right
(That’s just physics, dude)
It just isn’t consistent with reflected light
(It’s just physics, dude)
What we’re looking at here defies common sense
(It’s just physics, dude)
Is it something with the angle of incidence?
(It’s just physics, dude)

She is standing before a full-length looking glass
She don’t cast the reflection that you’d think she’d cast
I just don’t understand why she’s not more dismayed
To appear in the mirror as the Queen of Spades

There’s a way we expect a mirror to behave
(That’s just physics, dude)
There’s a model of light, a dual particle-wave
(It’s just physics, dude)
I may not understand what all those theories are
(I flunked physics, dude)
But I’ve seen mirrors before, this one’s all FUBAR
(Simple physics, dude)

She is standing before a full-length looking glass
She don’t cast the reflection that you’d think she’d cast
I just don’t understand why she’s not more dismayed
To appear in the mirror as the Queen of Spades

There’s a chick in the mirror in a whole other dress
There’s a possibility it’s magic, I guess
There’s no way—you could try, but I’m thinking that no
There’s no way to explain this weird scenario

Queen of Spades

There’s a redhead whose hair somehow reflects as black
There’s a heart that’s embroidered across her back
There’s another new shirt on the site today
Like a different new shirt was here yesterday

She is standing before a full-length looking glass
She don’t cast the reflection that you’d think she’d cast
I just don’t understand why she’s not more dismayed
To appear in the mirror as the Queen of Spades

Queen of Spades
Queen of Spades
Queen of Spades
What—how is she—Queen of Spades
This doesn’t—what? Queen of Spades
I don’t see how—Queen of Spades

Wear this shirt: to distract attention from your own total lack of reflection in mirrors.

Don’t wear this shirt: in the company of the Queen of Diamonds. If she gets the chance, she’ll beat you.

This shirt tells the world: “I’m asking her to make a change.”

We call this color: Card Suits Are Red And Black, Interview Suits Are Brown

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Features

Our graphic tees are made for all those days (see every day) that you need to get shirt done! Our professionally printed t-shirts are produced in-house to create an experience you will never forget.

Seriously, our t-shirts have been a graphic tee loving enthusiast's favorite since 2007. Our t-shirt designs are created by the best artists in the industry. We know that the combination of our t-shirts, exclusive design selection, world-class artists, and quality production, makes people smile.

Sizing Chart:

Please check our sizing chart before you order.

Classic T-Shirt Fit:

This shirt is made for those of you that like a looser fitting shirt (classic seemed appropriate)! This t-shirt is made from the finest ring spun cotton to make you look Woot-astic!

  • Standard fit (slightly boxy t-shirt, a little loose)
  • Fiber Content: 4.5 oz/yd 100% Combed ring spun cotton
  • Manufactured In: Honduras
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA

Fitted T-Shirt Fit:

Our fitted t-shirts are made for those times when you want to feel slimmer — or when you want to go out on the town — or just because you like fitted shirts 'cause you're slim and stuff. This t-shirt is made from the finest ring spun cotton to make you look fit-astic (get it?)!

  • Fitted T-Shirt fit (narrower shoulder and body)
  • Fiber Content: 4.2 oz/yd 100% Combed ring spun cotton
  • Manufactured In: USA, Central America, Vietnam or Bangladesh
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA

Specs

Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
0m 59.000s
First Sucker:
nparmeter
Last Wooter to Woot:
solax636

Purchaser Experience

  • 0% first woot
  • 95% second woot
  • 5% < 10 woots
  • 0% < 25 woots
  • 0% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 7% joined today
  • 1% one week old
  • 3% one month old
  • 28% one year old
  • 61% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 95% bought 1
  • 5% bought 2
  • 1% bought 3 or more

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

10%
6%
3%
2%
1%
1%
3%
4%
5%
5%
5%
5%
6%
9%
4%
3%
4%
2%
3%
3%
3%
4%
5%
3%
12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Percentage of Sales Per Day

7%
9%
4%
4%
4%
67%
5%
Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat Sun

Woots by State

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Two Queens by patrickspens
$19.00 In Stock Apparel & Accessories
$19.00 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 15
Woot! Shirt.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.