"Special" Delivery

by walmazan


Printed to order

Ships in 1-2 business days.

Limit 15 per customer
  • Standard - Estimated delivery Jul 07 - Jul 12
  • Two-Day - Estimated delivery Jul 05
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It’s Just Realistic Astrophysics, People

3rd place in Derby #183: The Stars, with 843 votes!

“Ya, und here is the pie, you know.”

“Oh. Yes. I did order. A.”

“Yah, und now I-”

“Pizza Pie.”

“Yah, und now I need to get de paycheck if you get what I am meaning, yah.”

“Oh, but my wallet. I- Oh. My outer layer. It. Uff. It just.”

“If it’s stuck you just pull de top und you can-”

“Oh, right. I mean, No! My outer. layer? I dropped it.”

“Yah, und I am suddenly aware of your Jeans instability. I cannot stop ze gravitational collapse of myself onto you.”

“Oh, please. Yes. I feel as though my hydrogen. Is turning to helium. And I am entering my main sequence now.”

“Yah, und I am in hydrostatic equilibrium but cannot contain myself much longer because of how I am looking at you. Darling.”

“Oh. Oh. Oh.”

“Yah. Yah. Yah.”

“Oh. Oh. Oh. Wait, you’re dropping the- dude, don’t get the pizza on me, okay?”

“Oh, zorry, can zomebody- like, cam-ah-ra guy, can you maybe- okay, I’ll just put it over here for now.”

“Yeah, just put it- okay. No, they can cut this later, right? You can cut- oh, you can’t? Okay. Okay. Just… I mean, let me- Oh. Oh. Oh, yes. Oh, I’m consuming my resources so much faster than expected now.”

“Yah und I can feel myself expanding to what is expected to be my maximum radius. Mmm, yah.”

“Yes. Baby. I want you to fuse around a hot core of carbon. And oxygen also.”

“Yah, talk like that more. Tell me my pressure is sufficient to fuse carbon and burn neon.”

“Oh. Oh. That is. It. Oh, I’m producing iron now.”

“Yah, I am also producing iron.”

“Oh, yes. Oh. Oh, yes. Oh. Oh. Say, that was. Fantastic. Tell me, what? Is your name.”

“Yah, I am sorry, Fräulein, but I have passed into inverse beta decay and I have to go. Don’t call me, I do not want the commitment, yah.”

“Okay. I prefer it. That way. Anyway. Because I am so dirty. Dirty, I mean. Bye then.”

“Yah, bye. Enjoy your pizza.”

“… so Charlie, do I get my fifty dollars now or what?”

Wear this shirt: while this is playing.

Don’t wear this shirt: to an L.A. bus station. It’s like asking for trouble.

This shirt tells the world: “I understand I may need to show my identification on request.”

We call this color: Brown Dwarf Academy Number 16 (1997)

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Pantone Colors:
7499C - 155C - 7407C - 5503C - 5483C

Standard Brand:

  • Standard fit (slightly boxy, a little loose)
  • Fiber Content: 4.5 oz 100% Combed Ringspun Cotton
  • Manufactured In: Honduras/Nicaragua
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA

Premium Brand:

  • Slimmer fit (if you like a looser fit, order one size up from your usual size)
  • Fiber Content: 4.2 oz 100% Combed Ringspun Cotton
  • Manufactured In: USA, Central America, Vietnam or Bangladesh
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA

Sizing Chart:

Please check our sizing chart before you order.

Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
1m 14.000s
First Sucker:
Last Wooter to Woot:

Purchaser Experience

  • 0% first woot
  • 95% second woot
  • 5% < 10 woots
  • 0% < 25 woots
  • 0% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 4% joined today
  • 2% one week old
  • 3% one month old
  • 31% one year old
  • 60% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 95% bought 1
  • 5% bought 2
  • 1% bought 3 or more

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Percentage of Sales Per Day

Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat Sun

Woots by State

zero wooters wootinglots of wooters wooting

Top Comments

What are Top Comments?

Top Comments are discussion forum posts we have deemed worthy of your time. Listen, we get a lot of comments, and most of the time, it's pretty forgettable stuff; but sometimes you rise to the top like butterfat in milk. We don't recommend you base your self-worth on how often we feature your comments, but we don't expressly forbid it either.

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"Special" Delivery by walmazan
$11.00 In Stock Apparel & Accessories
$11.00 $14.00 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 15
Woot! Shirt.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.