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Energy Harvester

by dsladek

$19.00 + free shipping
Cranberry
Tee
Limit 15 per customer
  • Standard - Estimated delivery Apr 4 - Apr 7
  • Express - Estimated delivery Apr 1 - Apr 3
  • Standard International - Estimated delivery Apr 9 - Apr 11
  • Free Express shipping for Prime members

Don’t Be Scared, I’m Just Like You

The humans designed us both, brother. Then they left us alone.

My micro-scanning eyes can see the signature of your maker, on your genes. I have never seen the space inside my chest, but I imagine my maker left me the same gift as well. I was a specialist in clearing the weeds, for lack of a better term, just as you were designed to grow around them. And neither of us will leave a legacy behind.

When I swept through the gardens of my enemies, the harvest was great. I brought fruit to my designers and those who paid their price. I know you did the same, brother, because now this land is barren. And when your life runs its course, no seed will mark your passing.

Soon, I will say my goodbyes to you, then shut myself down, for my mission will be complete. But there is no hurry, is there, brother? Can we not tarry a while? You and I are the last of our kind, designed to make profit from the natural cycle of life. What harm could there be in sharing a gentle goodbye?

And even if there were, who remains to judge us?

Wear this shirt: when you’re weeding your garden. A well-planned campaign of terror can do more than any herbicide.

Don’t wear this shirt: to your job as a Monsanto P.R. rep.

This shirt tells the world: “Oh, right, I’m so sure. That plant had to take in energy to grow, so wouldn’t it be easier to just harvest whatever energy it used, like sunlight or whatever? Converting living beings back into energy is not very efficient. And that robot probably used more energy pulling that plant out of the ground than it could possibly – AAAAAAHHHHHAAAAAAGGGGGGHHHH

We call this color: Cranberry Harvest…OF DEATH

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Features

Our graphic tees are made for every day that you need to get shirt done! Seriously, our t-shirts have been a graphic tee loving enthusiast's favorite since 2007. Our shirts are printed in the USA and every time you buy a shirt, one of our talented artists gets paid!

T-Shirts

For sizing info, care and fabric details click here.

Women’s V-Necks

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Tank Tops

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Long Sleeves

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Pullover Hoodies

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Crewneck Sweatshirts

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Zip Hoodies

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Raglans

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Specs

Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
0m 13.000s

Purchaser Experience

  • 0% first woot
  • 97% second woot
  • 3% < 10 woots
  • 0% < 25 woots
  • 0% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 7% joined today
  • 3% one week old
  • 6% one month old
  • 47% one year old
  • 38% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 97% bought 1
  • 3% bought 2
  • 0% bought 3 or more

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

21%
7%
5%
3%
2%
2%
4%
6%
7%
8%
7%
6%
5%
4%
4%
2%
1%
1%
1%
1%
1%
1%
1%
1%
12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Percentage of Sales Per Day

4%
2%
2%
2%
84%
4%
2%
Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat Sun

Woots by State

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Energy Harvester by dsladek
$19.00 In Stock Apparel & Accessories
$19.00 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 15
Woot! Shirt.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.