Fire Dancer

by Annajo

$19.00 + free shipping

Color Asphalt

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Why Would Wiki Lie

1st place in Derby #59: At The Luau, with 661 votes!

This shirt made us immediately think about hula, and we were going to talk a little bit about the traditions and culture behind hula and maybe make a few jokes about topless women, you know, the regular stuff. But then, during our research, we discovered the hula maʻi. From what little we read, the hula maʻi is apparently a dance done to celebrate the High Chief’s genitals. Isn’t that the most amazing thing?

Why hasn’t this part of Hawaiian culture caught on with the mainland? We’ve got tiki mugs and flower necklaces and little dolls that haunt the Brady Bunch but no genital celebration dances. Step it up, Marsha! Tell you what, you want to impress the head of a multi-national into giving you an interview, a genital celebration dance is the way to do it. Just, for Heaven’s sake, don’t get anything wrong. Even the slightest mistake in the hula maʻi can bring everyone years of bad luck. And of course, it would be disrespectful to the genitals of the chief. A chief is going to remember things like that.

This shirt was designed by: Annajo, who probably had no idea we were going to take this lovely shirt and turn it into a discussion regarding the genitals of the rich and powerful. We hope you didn’t tell your mom to be here today.

Wear this shirt: to show that you probably have a copy of Papua New Guinea in your record box. And if you don’t, why don’t you? There are like three thousand different versions out there, there’s gotta be at least one you like.

Don’t wear this shirt: and expect to be ignored. People are going to notice a shirt like this. People who will come up and say things about genitals. And you’ll have to be prepared.

This shirt tells the world: “Hit me with your Kālaʻau! Hit me! Hit me!”

We call this color: Don’t Drop That Here Or You’ll Melt The Asphalt

Features

Our graphic tees are made for every day that you need to get shirt done! Seriously, our t-shirts have been a graphic tee loving enthusiast's favorite since 2007. Our shirts are printed in the USA and every time you buy a shirt, one of our talented artists gets paid!