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I Zap Ducks

by Dann Matthews

$19.00 + free shipping
Limit 15 per customer
  • Standard - Estimated delivery Dec 22 - Dec 23
  • Express - Estimated delivery Dec 20
  • Free Express shipping for Prime members

I Still Hear His Horrible Snicker

“YAY! Daddy’s home from hunting with… Daddy, where’s Roscoe?”

“Roscoe? I don’t remember any Roscoe living here, honey.”

“The dog, silly daddy!”

“Oh. Oh, right. The dog. Yes, well, I suppose he decided to, uh, stay behind.”

“Wha? Not my special laughing puppy!”

“I’m afraid so, sweetie. It’s, um, going to be okay, though! Yeah, because he’s, uh, going to keep all the ducks company for the rest of the year, you see. That’s why he stayed! Yes, isn’t that clever? Such a brave dog, that Roscoe. Such a brave, patronizing, condescending, giggling little mutt I MEAN GOOD PUPPY! Very good good good good puppy!”

“Daddy, why is your face all red?”

“DON’T YOU SASS ME, TOO, YOUNG MAN. Oh, god, I’m sorry. I just miss the dog like you do, but it’s really for the best, okay? He’s going to be fine. Hey, this way, Roscoe’s already there for Daddy’s next big hunting trip. Isn’t that great?”

“Can I go with you to visit him next time, Daddy?”

“NO! I mean, hunting is for big boys, buddy. Maybe when you’re much much older and have forgotten completely about Roscoe. Now why don’t you grab a coat and we’ll go to the pet store for a new puppy! One that doesn’t mock your father’s hunting prowess every chance he gets, huh? Heh. Heh HEH. How does that sound?! HA HA. I THINK IT SOUNDS LOVELY! AHAHAHaha…”

Wear this shirt: if twenty years ago, the world as you knew it changed forever.

Don’t wear this shirt: if you’re a member of People For The Ethical Treatment Of Virtual Animals.

This shirt tells the world: “I Zapper Ducks.” Or, “I Zap Ducks.” It’s open to interpretation is what I’m trying to say.

We call this color: Duck Blind Black

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Our graphic tees are made for all those days (see every day) that you need to get shirt done! Our professionally printed t-shirts are produced in-house to create an experience you will never forget.

Seriously, our t-shirts have been a graphic tee loving enthusiast's favorite since 2007. Our t-shirt designs are created by the best artists in the industry. We know that the combination of our t-shirts, exclusive design selection, world-class artists, and quality production, makes people smile.

Sizing Chart:

Please check our sizing chart before you order.

Classic T-Shirt Fit:

This shirt is made for those of you that like a looser fitting shirt (classic seemed appropriate)! This t-shirt is made from the finest ring spun cotton to make you look Woot-astic!

  • Standard fit (slightly boxy t-shirt, a little loose)
  • Fiber Content: 4.5 oz/yd 100% Combed ring spun cotton
  • Manufactured In: Honduras
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA

Fitted T-Shirt Fit:

Our fitted t-shirts are made for those times when you want to feel slimmer — or when you want to go out on the town — or just because you like fitted shirts 'cause you're slim and stuff. This t-shirt is made from the finest ring spun cotton to make you look fit-astic (get it?)!

  • Fitted T-Shirt fit (narrower shoulder and body)
  • Fiber Content: 4.2 oz/yd 100% Combed ring spun cotton
  • Manufactured In: USA, Central America, Vietnam or Bangladesh
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA


Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
2m 1.000s
First Sucker:
Last Wooter to Woot:

Purchaser Experience

  • 0% first woot
  • 92% second woot
  • 8% < 10 woots
  • 0% < 25 woots
  • 0% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 10% joined today
  • 1% one week old
  • 2% one month old
  • 21% one year old
  • 66% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 92% bought 1
  • 7% bought 2
  • 1% bought 3 or more

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Percentage of Sales Per Day

Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat Sun

Woots by State

zero wooters wootinglots of wooters wooting

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I Zap Ducks by Dann Matthews
$19.00 In Stock Apparel & Accessories
$19.00 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 15
Woot! Shirt.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.