1st place in Derby #132: Heart, with 1123 votes!

What do all these diverse lifeforms have in common? OK, you’d rather not be set up on a blind date with any of them, but what else? (Wait, really? Even Frankie? He’s really sweet when you get to know him, you should give him a chance.)

That’s right, they’ve all got heart. And, if we ever learned anything from the great Washington Senators manager Van Buren, it’s that heart is what you gotta have. The rest of the circulatory system is helpful as well, but without the main pump, it’s just so much stringy goop.

Say, this just occurred to us, but when you think about the word “courage” etymologically, it sort of seems like the Cowardly Lion and the Tin Man wanted almost the same thing. It’s strange that the Lion was asking for something abstract, though, like “courage,” while the Scarecrow and Tin Man needed actual organ donations. Maybe Baum should have symbolized the Lion’s deficiency anatomically, as with the other characters Dorothy encounters. He could have had the Lion ask the Wizard for cojones.

Wear this shirt: when you’re feeling heart smart.

Don’t wear this shirt: during open-heart surgery, either as the patient or the physician.

This shirt tells the world: “Here I sit, broken-hearted.”

We call this color: Hearther Gray

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