Today's Woot Write-up

1st Place in Derby #379: 25k Cup, Round V: Naughty & Nice: Redux, with 199 votes!

Woot's A+ Number 1 Best Guac Recipe

stuff you need:

3 avocados

1 massive jalapeño

1 onion, tepid

tube of toothpaste

3 teaspoons lime juice

lock of Todd Rundgren’s hair

some meat?

6 cups soil from Nana’s backyard


3 garlic cloves, scorned

handful of staples for garnish.


Now make the magic happen

Hold two avocados in one hand and the third in your other hand. Attempt to juggle for 4 minutes. If spouse is not impressed, go cry in the tub.

Mash everything. EVERYTHING. Channel all the years of anger, the resentment, the BETRAYAL … this guac’s gonna be amazing.

Spoon guac into caulking gun and apply liberally to stuff.


If you decide to eat staples, please don’t sue us.

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Guac a mole

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Guac a mole by walmazan
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